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It’s your own sadness, your own needs, all being retroactively attributed to something from which he has recovered every way but physically—which is the only way that matters in the cultural narrative you’re expected to play out.
It’s keeping the strained smile on your face when, after your partner plans an anniversary dinner at a restaurant that advertises itself as accessible, you find out that “accessible” means that some people get helped up the steps to the only entrance. “My chair weighs three hundred pounds,” he says, incredulous.
We all have collections of stills in our minds, people we gather as representatives of groups we don’t fully understand: a fervent doll-collecting aunt, the neighbor’s boyfriend who had that rare disorder.
They, along with predictable images in the media, form image clusters that make up prototypes, patterns from which we will only deviate if we’re radically convinced.
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