Dating in the fifties
“At its center was a desire for security–in the form of ‘going steady.'” We no longer use “going steady” in dating language today, but it was the prevalent form of dating in the 1950s. A guy gave his girlfriend a “‘visible token’ (class ring, letter sweater, etc.) or they exchanged identical tokens, often gold or silver friendship rings worn on the third finger of the left hand” when they were ready to go steady.The purpose was to publicly declare their relationship and commitment. “Other steadies spelled out their names on the bumpers of their boyfriends’ car.” Some girls would wear a “Puppy Love Anklet.” When she wore it on her left ankle, it meant she was committed. In a pinning ceremony, “a fraternity member gives his fraternity pin to a woman in a sorority, symbolizing that he values his girlfriend more than his house.” This symbolizes a high form of commitment, and some might see it as a pre-engagement gesture. In steady dating, “the boy had to call the girl a certain number of times a week and take her on a certain number of dates a week.” He might take her to the pizza parlor, a malt shop, the record store, or the drive-in movie theater. It wasn’t appropriate for a guy to ask a girl on the day of the date.Take care of yourself, live life with purpose, and aim to be someone you’d want to date. If you’re self-assured, prioritizing what matters and pursuing the things you love, you’re living a full life. a young woman in San Francisco, met a man—call him John—on the dating site OKCupid. More notably, he indulged in the kind of profligate displays of affection which signal a definite eagerness to commit.
They’re a staple of Jane Austen novels: John Willoughby, who caddishly breaks Marianne’s heart in “Sense and Sensibility”; George Wickham, who reels in both Lizzy and Lydia Bennett in “Pride and Prejudice”; Frank Churchill, in “Emma,” who flirts with Miss Woodhouse while being secretly engaged to her frenemy, Jane Fairfax. As a twenty-first-century guy living in one of the most culturally liberal of American cities, he had options available to him that men in Regency England did not.
John was a champion girlfriend accumulator, the ringmaster of a romantic circus that only he could see.
Every so often, one of his paramours would catch on and alert the others.
“Going steady had become a sort of play-marriage, a mimicry of the actual marriage of their slightly older peers.” “While either could go out with friends of the same sex, each must always know where the other was and what he or she was doing.” Whether it was the sock hop, prom, a sorority dance, or a fraternity formal, “going steady meant a guaranteed date for special events…” Sock hops became popular in the 1950s, and arose because these dances would take place on basketball courts.
To make sure the floors didn’t get scuffed, everyone would take their shoes off.